Her Way of Giving Back

January 15, 2009

Topics: Special Events | People Profiles

 

The following article appeared in the Fall 2008 edition of Maine Audubon's Habitat.

 

Artwork in the Maine Artists at Maine Audubon auction answers in many beautiful ways the question of what we find in the nature of Maine. With their talent, these artists are able to look out at nature and harness the beauty, mystery, and emotion staring back.

When Carmen Menjivar of Portland enters the woods she finds her past-one that includes tragedy and a lost home but also, thankfully, reconciliation. Capturing all this in gnarled tree roots and light in shadow, her paintings have become her way of honoring nature's gift of peace. Donating to this year's auction, she said, is her gift to nature.

Carmen's long journey begins in El Salvador, where she grew up sketching flowers in her grandfather's garden and exploring palm-lined beaches. Sadly, that peace wasn't to last. During a deadly civil war, Carmen's uncle ran for vice-president, making life for her family even more dangerous.

It was outside a restaurant that her life shattered. A gunman meant to scare Carmen's uncle by shooting her aunt-the bullet found Carmen's mother instead. Within a week of that tragic moment, Carmen and her family had fled to different corners of the world. It would be years before she found a place that felt like home.

After living in California, Carmen married and moved to Maine, where she found the home she was looking for. She had been studying engineering to please her father, but decided that she could no longer deny her true passion-art. Enrolling in the art program at the University of Southern Maine, Carmen thought, "This is where I belong."

Though years behind her, the pain of her mother's death was still sharp. She encountered it on her frequent runs through the woods in places like Gilsland Farm sanctuary. As she pushed her body as hard as she could, out came guilt and anger, sadness and regret. But as the woods brought out these dark emotions, so too did they bring them into the light.

"It's hard to describe," said Carmen of those runs through the trees. "For a long time I punished myself, but after years somehow it gave me perspective. Being in the woods was the first time I felt peace. It was my way of coming to terms."

Her art reaches at what she can't find words to describe. With a touch of the abstract-as she calls it "pursuing something beyond the reality"-her work tries to make the energy and presence of nature come off the canvas with colors, texture, and striking image.

Art has become her way of honoring the nature where she has found so much, Carmen said, and donating her work to Maine Audubon is an extension of that. "I see it as giving back to the woods through the work of Maine Audubon," Carmen said, "an organization that I know will do well by it."